Friendship in adolescence has a basic function . Humans are a ‘gregarious’ species, so we need to feel that we fit socially. This need becomes more imperative during this stage.
Adolescents with difficulties to establish friendships usually present school problems, self-esteem, self-concept and possible emotional imbalances in adulthood.
Personality in adolescence
Adolescence is a period of transition between childhood and adulthood. Because of this, there will be frequent changes that will serve to structure the adult personality. In this period, the public will go looking for what his personal, interpersonal, ideological and vocational goals will be.
Adolescents are in a constant situation of indecision in which they explore different alternatives , unable to stay in any of them. This leads them to adopt beliefs and purposes suggested or imposed by others until they find the ones that really identify them.
Adolescence can be divided into three stages:
- Early (10-13 years). This stage is characterized by a marked self-contentedness. Thus, either he will believe that no one can understand him, due to his “special” way of seeing and acting in life, or he can feel that he is the center of all eyes, acting according to what he thinks others expect of him. the.
- Average (14-17 years). In this period individualism becomes more evident: it spends more time alone. There is risk awareness, but there is a tendency to seek new experiences , mainly within their peer group. At the same time he begins to worry about the emotions and feelings of others.
- Late (from 18). In this phase the personality is consolidated . It is the result of the lived process .Friendship in adolescence
Role of friendship in adolescence
At the beginning of Friendship in adolescence, a period of rebellion begins and a distancing from the family environment begins.
- The peer group begins to take on much importance.
- He will question the limits imposed by his parents, since he will realize that these are not perfect.
- The search for an exclusive friendship begins. The figure of the “best friend” emerges.
- Idealize the pairs.
- There is a certain pressure to gain membership in a group.
- Relationships become intense, mainly those involving people of the same sex.
As adolescence progresses, the need for identity with their peer group intensifies. In this way, the greatest influence that the pubescent receives comes from his social circle, both for good and for bad. Thus, it will adopt the identity of its group, moving away from what is established in the family:
- The groups become both sexes.
- The couples begin to settle down.
- The friends become the most important reference.
- It can be the most conflictive period with parents.
In the last stage, personality integration is achieved. This will depend on the experiences and the support (family and social) obtained, among others. Friendship at the end of adolescence is characterized by a loss of influence.
- The individual personality is consolidated.
- Friendships are more selective: less quantity, more quality.
- The bond with parents is reinforced.
Sexuality in adolescence
In the first stage of Friendship in adolescence there is evidence of great concern about his physique and the changes that are taking place in his body. They need to know that what happens to them is normal, so they compare themselves to others. It also increases the sexual impulse and the need to experiment and define its gender role.
In the next stage an acceptance of his new body is evident, arising the need to experiment sexually. Flirting begins and couple relationships are established, which can idealize romantically.
In the final stage, relationships tend to become more intimate and stable. They are based on shared interests and similar values.
Parents and friendship in adolescence
Several investigations have shown the qualities that parents should have so that their children do not leave them during adolescence:
- Let them know that we love them and that we respect their decisions, even if some of us do not like them.
- Put limits appropriate to each age. The rules must be clear and reasonable.Friendship in adolescence
- Recognize when they strive, reinforcing and praising. While we will give support when you have a situation that overflows, although it seems a trifle.
- Set an example and be responsible.
- Facilitate exposure to new experiences.
- To be interested in your friends (and your parents). This involves knowing them and sharing time with them, in a way that is not intrusive. Talk about them and about friendship. Be a good friend
- Accept that friends have influence over our children, but that they are the ones who decide. A good education will avoid surprises. This involves teaching him to avoid compromising situations .
- Do not forbid you to go with certain friends. Although we can clarify the reason why some of their friends generate mistrust.