Ideally, the person we want to be with whom we share our home. However, it is not always so. Many times we maintain a commitment with someone, while our heart points towards another person. Why, by loving another, are we not able to leave our partner?
Maybe someone woke up in your very nice feeling, but after the time that passion was dwindling and another person is the one that now makes your heartbeat. The sensible thing would be to face the problem and decide to start a new course, but something stops you.
Today we will talk about the reasons why we stay with someone even though we no longer love him. You will understand that you are not alone and that, although you do not believe it, there are exits for your situation.
Why can not we leave our partner?
The reasons why we are not able to leave our partner even though we no longer love her are many. Here we present the main reasons:
When we decide to have a relationship as a couple we tacitly acquire the commitment to be at their side for life. So it’s easy to feel trapped between what you think you should be and what your emotions tell you.
Fear of hurting:
As much as we stop loving our partner, we prefer to sacrifice ourselves for fear of hurting him, sacrificing our own happiness.
Fear of the future:
The person with whom we have a relationship, regardless of whether we love it or not, gives us a certain sense of stability that we fear losing in exchange for what would start from scratch with a new romance. We suggest to learn perfect bonding with your partner How self esteem affects relationships? 3 questions to test.
What family and friends say will weigh heavily on the decisions we make. Separating by loving another is not well seen in society, especially when the woman who has stopped loving her partner is the woman.
When there are children involved, it is likely that we choose to sacrifice ourselves, even if we love someone else, as long as the children grow up in a home with the father as the head. This impedes us enormously to advance in the rupture of a couple relationship.
Leaving aside those reasons why we are not able to leave our partner even though we are loving another, we must take into account the consequences that this can bring:
The discomfort caused by the fact of not wanting to be with someone can be translated into aggressive behavior towards the couple, causing a hostile environment in the home that ends up affecting our happiness and that of all household members, including children.
As much as we repeat again and again that the right thing to do is to remain with the couple, the fact that we can not live with who we truly love fills us with frustration and anger with ourselves.
Repressed feelings for a long time end up generating constant anxiety and sadness and can affect our self-esteem.
The fear of abandoning our partner and starting life with a new person means that we can take the dangerous path of infidelity. A situation that, if discovered, will bring us many more problems than if we had raised the issue from the beginning.
What to do?
The most healthy thing is to be next to the person you love
Reflect how strong that feeling is and if the person you could leave your partner with corresponds to you with the same intensity. Evaluate how much you are sacrificing not hurting others.
Pose the situation to your current partner
Explain that this has nothing to do with your value as a person, that feelings may change and that you need a time away to make a final decision. Sincerity is one of the most profound qualities we can have as a couple.
Although sometimes, even loving another, we believe that we are not able to leave our partner, the endings are necessary. When you are no longer happy next to a person, it was time to finish and move towards a new direction. Overcome the vicissitudes with maturity and security, not only in a relationship but in life in general.