First of all, before I begin to explain what emotional intelligence is and what is the coaching in emotional intelligence, I want to define some concepts that you may not have very clear and that are essential for you to understand, since you would understand what is the sea If you do not know what water is? Difficult, right?
Emotions, those great strangers!
Would you know how to express your emotions? Without using expressions such as “my hair stands on end”, “I am trilling” or “I feel excited”. The latter is always associated with pleasant feelings, right? Because that expression is incorrect.
Being excited is feeling any emotion. It can be anger, pain, sadness, anxiety, it can be totally contradictory to what you feel and want to express.
Emotions are an abstract concept since they can not be seen. Instead, they are present in all human beings and also in some animals . They appear after perceiving changes in our environment or internal changes.
Each of them has its own characteristics, a different purpose and a variable duration , at most several minutes. When they remain for longer they become a state of mind, with the danger that they can turn into psychological illnesses .
In general features the functions of emotions are:
Primary emotions
In humans they are useful for survival , for example; joy has the function of affiliation (looking for a partner to reproduce), fear avoids imminent grave danger, death, being hurt. etc.
Other basic emotions
Other emotions have the function of facilitating adaptation to social relationships , such as anxiety, happiness, love and hostility. That is, they serve to communicate and relate to others, to empathize and predict what others feel for their gestures, language or behavior.
Self-conscious and complex emotions
Self-conscious and complex emotions, such as guilt, shame and pride, have as a function to self-evaluate. They serve to regulate our behavior and to adjust or change our goal or goals.
What is emotional intelligence and what is it for?
Emotional Intelligence is the set of all the knowledge of emotions, abilities and resources that we have to adapt to change.
Emotional Intelligence means knowing emotions well, knowing how to detect them, managing them and directing them towards an end. It also helps us to motivate ourselves and take the necessary action to achieve our goals.
What is the purpose of coaching in emotional intelligence?
The coaching in emotional intelligence can be used for many things. The purpose with which coaching is used in emotional intelligence depends on each person and what they want to identify and achieve .
Here is a list of possible coaching functions in emotional intelligence.
- Would you like to know and identify your emotions well? Coaching in emotional intelligence is ideal to achieve it.
- Do you want to know better your virtues, your shortcomings, your abilities and abilities? Coaching in emotional intelligence is an excellent tool.
- Once you have identified the above, do you want to strengthen your virtues and minimize the defects? Coaching in emotional intelligence helps you do it.
- During our life we experience changes, which are excellent opportunities for our growth. Many times we take those changes as something “bad” that has happened to us. With the coaching in emotional intelligence you can see the positive and healthy part of the changes, while remaining realistic.
- Coaching in emotional intelligence also serves to find different solutions to the same problem.
- And to decide which option is the most convenient.
- Coaching in emotional intelligence is used a lot to motivate you to fight to achieve your goals .
- And to achieve your goals more easily and efficiently.
- And the most important thing to learn to lead a balanced, calm and full life.
Relationship between coaching and emotional intelligence
As human beings, there is nothing in life or work that is not affected by our emotions. The emotional intelligence is a key factor to ensure satisfactory results when we work with others, bypassing the accumulated knowledge and skills learned. Dexterity in accessing emotional intelligence should be considered the basis for personal and professional growth , as well as for leadership development.
Definition of emotional intelligence and its connection with coaching
The emotional intelligence is the ability to understand why you think and act as you do , so you can choose the best way of thinking and acting at all times. As a result you can also better understand other people : what motivates them, how to work in coordination and how to inspire them to reach their potential. Lovey and Mayer, the theorists who proposed the idea of the existence of an emotional intelligence, described it as the ability to perceive emotions, generate and understand them, in order to properly regulate emotions and promote intellectual and emotional growth.
Coaching seeks to modify the behavior of people to achieve goals , acting as a guide in the process to achieve success . So emotional intelligence appears as an excellent tool for change and the achievement of objectives, mainly for two reasons:
- What we are and what we do is very influenced by the emotions of each person. To ignore the emotional component is to guide only half of the person during the coaching process.
- In addition, emotional intelligence , defined as the ability to effectively manage emotions, appears as a tool to encompass the whole person during coaching.
Coaching is based on relationships, and relationships are modified, reinforced or distanced by emotions. A good coach takes on the emotional intelligence competencies that make it possible for him to act as a leader and counselor, while also exploring the objectives and values of the coaches or client, helping him to expand his repertoire of skills and answers. A coach who uses emotional intelligence is self-aware, is usually sincere, creative, able to provide help, and go beyond simple advice.
Aspects shared by emotional intelligence and coaching
There are some areas that characterize emotional intelligence and that are perfectly applicable in a coaching process:
Identify and recognize emotions, being able to perceive, evaluate and express them. Label both the emotions that a person feels, and the emotions of others. It includes the perception of how other people are feeling at a certain moment.
Ability to use emotions appropriately. It consists of acquiring the ability to create emotions and use them in the development of creativity, empathy and problem solving. An example of appropriate emotions is to substitute anger for annoyance, anguish for healthy worry,
Understanding and analysis of emotions using all emotional knowledge. It refers to the ability to understand more complex emotions and how an emotion can have as a consequence the appearance of another emotion. An example would be when a person feels jealous and knows that he will end up getting angry. At the same time, he also knows that this anger will generate in the person a sense of fear or uncertainty regarding the relationship. Thus, the person, anticipating, will perceive that the relationship can be broken because of jealousy and subsequent anger.
Management and adaptive regulation of emotions. Ability to handle emotions intelligently in oneself and be able to perceive them in others. This will allow the use of techniques that favor the achievement of positive results in relationships with others.
Personal competence and social competence
It is important to remember that people can learn and develop their emotional intelligence. Everyone can strengthen their abilities both at the level of personal and social competence
On the one hand, personal competences are what determine the way in which a person relates to himself. They include the awareness of oneself (knowing exactly what one is feeling at a given moment and using it to favor decision-making), self-regulation (managing emotions so that they facilitate the task that is being carried out and do not harm it) ) and motivation (use preferences to guide objectives, be more effective and persevere despite setbacks).
And, on the other hand, social competences determine the way people relate to others. They understand empathy and social skills such as communication, conflict management, leadership, links or cooperation.
If you have ever intervened in a coaching process, surely you have clearly identified all the aspects that we have been shelling without needing to label it as emotional intelligence. However, it is undeniable that coaching drinks from many concepts of this current and after all one of its main objectives is to enhance emotional intelligence, since it is one of the keys to success in our personal and professional lives.
Finally, the development of Coaching as emotional intelligence are growing specialties, increasingly demanded in times of constant change and in the search for highly trained professional profiles that provide differential value in organizations. Therefore, this program aims to respond to an increasing demand of professionals who need a solid formation, specializing in innovative and effective disciplines in personal and professional growth and excellence.
