There are those who are not interested and those who seek it relentlessly. But the truth is, love happens. And then you have to take care of it. The emotional momentum and passion of the beginning are worn down by everyday life and habit. And it can be severely tested by great changes and dramatic events.
The couple’s relationship is in crisis: what to do?
Marina Osnaghi has no doubts. When the couple’s relationship goes into crisis, the first thing to do is to look inside ourselves. Only by becoming aware of our emotions and feelings can we face and solve the problems of our relationship. The Master Certified Coach suggests some powerful coaching questions that can help us take stock of ourselves:
- When did I start not feeling well?
- What’s different than before?
- What do I tolerate that doesn’t make me happy?
- What do I need to feel good?
Responding with honesty and clarity allows us to identify the reasons for our discomfort. And what we need to be happy and represents the sine qua non for having a positive and constructive discussion with our partner. Looking inside ourselves is the first and fundamental step to save the couple relationship
How to recover the couple relationship
The comparison with the partner represents a crucial point in the process to save the couple’s relationship. But how should it be managed? Marina Osnaghi explains that you need to have an attitude based on active listening and assertive communication. In other words, the Master Certified Coach invites us to be attentive, patient. And non-judgmental towards the partner and to give him the opportunity to express his emotions. And feelings of total freedom and serenity. Likewise, he urges us to speak to him with balance, honesty, and clarity. Dialogue must be carried on in the name of mutual respect and an attitude of openness. As Marina Osnaghi explains, this means keeping the tone low, avoiding accusations and recriminations, and explaining with sincerity and without exceeding the limit which behaviors bother us, hurt us, or have made us suffer. Master Certified Coach notes that making it clear what’s good and what’s wrong with the relationship allows us to understand if we want to save the relationship. And if the answer is yes, it allows us to establish a plan of action.
Marina Osnaghi explains that becoming aware of the positive and negative aspects of the relationship is in effect the first step not only to save the relationship but also to make it better. The things that work are those that express the very meaning of the couple and from which we can start again. For this to be possible, we must maintain a clear and sincere dialogue with the partner and learn to truly forgive. Only starting from these assumptions can we think of saving and making our relationship grow. The Master Certified Coach observes that respect, acceptance, and trust are fundamental in the process of change that awaits us to rebuild the couple relationship and which includes the ability to adopt different behaviors and to act in a new way compared to the past. The willingness to live new experiences, to review the routine, to deepen some neglected aspects of the relationship, to seek one or more compromises, everything depends on our ability to become aware of ourselves, to communicate to the partner who we are and what we want and to act consistently for the good of the couple.