Everyone sooner or later finds himself in a position to have mixed feelings. Let’s find out what it is and how to deal with them for a better life.
It is often said that love and hate are two sides of the same coin. Two opposites are able to meet each other until they get confused with each other. And on the other hand, who has never at least once found themselves in love with someone they hated? Not to mention when you end up hating someone you’ve loved for a long time.
Yet this condition, complex as it may appear, is quite simple when compared to one in which conflicting feelings are experienced simultaneously. These are situations in which you feel attraction and annoyance towards a person, in which you feel excited and scared by a new adventure, or in which you find yourself loving and hating someone. Strong feelings that mixed together create a certain underlying confusion and therefore need careful analysis. Because if it is true that experiencing opposite emotions is completely natural, it is also true that it can create inner chaos that it is necessary to know how to resolve in order to return to a life well.
How to deal with and overcome mixed feelings
When you find yourself having feelings in opposition to each other, the first thing that comes naturally is to make an effort to understand which of the two is wrong. The truth is that they are often both genuine and natural and this is probably the first hurdle that must be overcome. To become self-aware and to be able to live well in a situation in which you feel very different emotions, it is in fact important to be open-minded and accept things for what they are. So let’s explore the steps to take to deal with conflicting feelings.
As just mentioned, the first thing to do when you find yourself having feelings in clear opposition to each other is to accept them. Admitting what you feel is in fact the quickest way to get to grips with the problem and to be able to clarify within yourself and between your emotions. Denying it only leads to a very unpleasant and often difficult internal conflict to deal with. A conflict that in the long run can lead to irremediability.
Analyze what it feels like
Often, trying to look outward can be a good way to understand what you’re really feeling. It is, in fact, a different and unusual way of analyzing things. Even better if once faced with the problem you can identify yourself to the point of giving yourself advice. A bit like you would do with a dear friend. This is not so much to find a solution but to give us a real idea of what we are experiencing.
Look for a point of union between the opposite emotions
Many times, opposing feelings between them are a mix of nuances that if analyzed can bring to light truths that are not even imagined. For example, you may think you hate someone just because in reality you have never forgiven something. Something that would be enough to face again to leave room only for love. In other cases, the solution may lie in what a person triggers us. Thus it could emerge that the hatred we think we feel is actually directed towards ourselves and what its proximity makes us feel. The same thing can happen when you want to do something and at the same time you have a great fear of it. Learning to rationalize the latter can be a good way to get to know it, accept it, and leave room only for the desire to do.
Often, those who find themselves in a similar situation end up feeling indecisive. The idea leads to discouragement and being overwhelmed by emotions. The truth is, opposing feelings don’t necessarily represent indecision. Indeed, sometimes they can be a sign that you live the thing completely. It all depends on how we feel inside and the effect that those feelings have on us. What matters is never to be discouraged and keep moving in order to find the right way to experience it all.
Ask for help from an expert
Unfortunately, the solution is not always that simple. And when this happens, you can feel confused to the point of being sick and experiencing inner chaos that makes it impossible to have a peaceful life. When this occurs, the best solution is to seek help from an expert. In this way, we can hope to face the situation by taking it from different points of view. This is often the best way to do it and to understand both in which direction it is best to move and what you need to be truly happy.
Knowing how to recognize and deal with the presence of opposing feelings is equivalent to giving oneself the opportunity to embrace a more complete lifestyle. After all, the analysis that follows is often able to lead to self-knowledge that can only do well and that if well lived leads to living things more fully, feeling more alive than ever, and consequently more complete. It all lies in choosing to face the situation without hiding and avoiding certain solutions only because they are apparently uncomfortable or difficult to accept.