It so happened that women’s happiness has long been firmly associated with the presence of the second half. A successful marriage, mutual understanding, and love in the family is almost the only life goal for many women. However, building relationships do not always work out – perhaps the “prince” was not the one, and perhaps he is still on the way. What to do if the second half has not yet appeared on the horizon and the state of loneliness has become customary and commonplace? Is it possible to be happy without a man? Modern psychologists say with confidence – of course!
What is happiness and how to find it?
If you believe medical reference books on psychology, happiness is a rather ephemeral concept that implies absolute satisfaction with your life. At the same time, the term itself can be decoded as you please: for some, happiness lies in financial well-being, for others – in a successfully built career, for others – the opportunity to develop as a person … You can continue this list indefinitely because everyone has their own happiness. Of course, to receive satisfaction from having a man in life is also a kind of happiness, but his presence can in no way be the only source of that blissful state in which a truly happy woman resides.
Modern society dictates new rules, and today it is not enough for a successful woman to have a family – it is also necessary to take place socially, have a decent career, do what you love and, of course, enjoy it all. Moreover, looking for happiness only in the presence of a man beside her is rather naive and more like an addiction than a full-fledged relationship. Nevertheless, single women are sure that the appearance of a partner will magically change their lives for the better, will teach you to be happy and prosperous. In this case, the search for a husband turns into the only significant goal, and the long-awaited marriage most often becomes another disappointment: the husband seems to be there, but there is no more happiness. And all because happiness does not come by itself, and even the best and loving man cannot replace the whole world.
How to become happy without a man? Psychological educational program
To become happy, having a man is not at all necessary; the main thing is to sincerely believe it. Real, deep and full happiness is a complex of emotions and feelings that need to be brought into your life:
- Learn to see the beauty in what you have. Yes, now you do not have a man, but you have a favorite job, friends, and the opportunity to travel and build your life the way you want. No wonder the phrase of their cult Soviet film “Girls” has almost become an aphorism: today “eat halva”, tomorrow “gingerbread” because not bound by any obligations.
- Ignore obsessive advice. Girlfriends who managed to start a family, often trying to arrange your life, “matchmaker” with all the familiar men, even if they do not cause you any pleasant emotions? Surrounding all the forces trying to inspire that this is the notorious “last car” in which you need to jump without thinking? Parents at every family dinner remind you that they don’t mind being caught up with their grandchildren? Do not take their words to heart, do not be annoyed and in any case do not feel inferior – the fact that they see your happiness in creating a family does not mean that it is. Explain to your friends and acquaintances that your personal life is personal and that you will build it yourself, stop inappropriate advice and comments, move away from such conversations or simply change the subject.
- Eliminate pseudo-feeling. Another unpleasant side of dealing with married girlfriends is the so-called “sympathy”. Phrases like “poor thing, still one”, “lonely, probably, in the evenings”, etc., are extremely rarely truly sincere, and therefore it is better to stop them in the bud. Firstly, constantly humiliating your life by no means will help you to become happy, and secondly, the fact that they are trying to instill in you a feeling of inferiority is not the best basis for friendship.
- Look for positive emotions. To feel happy, it is not necessary to have a man, the main thing is to experience vivid emotions that love sometimes replaces. Jump with a parachute or bungee, go-karting, sign up for a club of climbers and go to conquer Everest – in a word, do what causes a real drive, a rush of emotions and adrenaline, and you yourself will not notice how you stop feeling unhappy and lonely.
- Bring love into your life. No matter how trite it may sound, to be happy, you need to give your love and receive in return a charge of positive emotions. However, love can be completely different, and therefore it will be quite easy to bring it into your everyday life. Get a pet, take care of it, sincerely love it – and in return, it will gladly welcome you to work and be bored during your absence.
How to fill your life in the absence of a man? 10 practical tips
Today, to organize life without the help of men is quite simple – the corresponding service can solve any problem: plumbers, furniture assemblers, repair teams, or, in extreme cases, “husband for an hour”. It is much more difficult not to feel alone and unhappy. However, it is enough to fill your life with really interesting and positive activities – and there is simply no time left for the longing and thoughts of “what if”:
Build a career. As a rule, women who are not burdened with relationships with the opposite sex are more successful and more productive at work. Their everyday life is much more predictable, and the emotional background does not depend on external factors. Focus on work (of course, only if it brings you pleasure), consider career opportunities and, if there are none, feel free to change your job position, because you need to grow professionally and strive for new heights. Do not be afraid of new responsibilities and difficult goals – everything is possible, you just have to want it!
Travel. Do not deny yourself the pleasure to visit new places at least once or twice a year, and it is not necessary to go to Goa or Maldives – if the funds do not yet allow, you can study the geography of your own country. Just take a bus and go to a new place, walk along unknown streets, see the sights, get acquainted with the local cuisine and color – it will help to distract from the everyday hustle and bustle and fill your life with new emotions and impressions.
Do sports. Yoga, Pilates, fitness or cardio workouts allow you not only to keep your body in shape but also to spend unused energy, keep an active lifestyle and effectively distract from current problems. Find the kind of sport that you will like and will fit your physical form: you should not start with mountaineering or marathon, otherwise, you can quickly “burn out” both morally and physically, but moderate activities 2-3 as a per week will come at an opportune moment.
Find a hobby. Begin to embroider a big picture, sign up for cooking classes, tie socks to all your relatives, or make clay modeling – it doesn’t matter, the main thing is that the new hobby brings pleasure and genuine interest. Be open to the new, constantly cultivating – and you can feel happy much faster than you think.
Chat with friends. The principle of “less social networks – more live communication” works at 100%. Phoned girlfriends, invite them to a cafe, for a picnic or shopping, have fun and do not refuse invitations yourself, even if the company does not seem to be very suitable for you. Try to surround yourself with like-minded people with whom you will be fun and interesting, but do not ignore new acquaintances – who know how many happy moments such communication can bring?
Engage in self-development. Finish vocational courses that you have long dreamed of, get a second (third, fifth, etc.) education, constantly learn and improve your skills – this way you can not only replenish your resume with another significant item but also become a truly successful woman. But success and recognition can make everyone happy for him happy!
Read more. Even if you are difficult to attribute to the number of book lovers, just try. The unimaginable aroma of prints creates a special atmosphere, and fascinating plots brings much more pleasure than it might seem at first glance. In addition, it is a good way to replenish vocabulary, to become a more interesting, versatile and well-read person, with whom there is always something to talk about.
Smile often. A happy person can’t help but smile. This simple truth acts on the subconscious better antidepressants, and therefore try to smile as often as possible and sincere. Start your day with a smile, even if the mood is worse than ever – so you can feel a little happier.
Change. Trite, but changes in appearance can make absolutely any woman happy. Update your wardrobe, make a fashionable haircut or, on the contrary, increase stylish curls, change your usual hairpins to comfortable sneakers – the main thing is that you like the new look!
Arrange a chic holiday. If gray days seem too bland, and there is neither time, nor energy, nor desire for entertainment, shake yourself and arrange a magnificent feast. The occasion can be any, starting with the birthday of your beloved dog and ending on a self-proclaimed day of independence from everyday commitments – gather friends, order a pizza, decorate an apartment, turn on the music louder or go all together to the nearest karaoke, solemnly giving yourself a promise not to be sad for a second!
As you can see, it is not difficult to become happy, and for this, you need nothing but your own desire. It is not necessary to wait for happiness, search for it or invent it – there are enough reasons for joy in the life of every person. Make your life rich and bright, do not be afraid of new emotions and interesting acquaintances, and then you will certainly succeed in becoming happy without a man!